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Fathers Of The Military Essay

1013 words - 5 pages

In the military they prepare their men to be the best they can be for the obstacles they might face when being deployed, or any other orders they might receive. But no one prepared them for being separated from their loved ones. Almost half the men who are deployed and serving our country are married and a little less than half are married and half children (insert citation-demographics chart).So what does it mean for these men? Does it make them a bad parent because they are deployed, or does it just mean they don’t get to be involved in their child’s life in the typical fashion such as seeing them every day, asking them how their day was, missing holidays and birthdays and the big moments in their children’s lives and so on.
Within a single cycle of a soldier’s deployment there are many emotions and factors that play a part of it, especially for fathers. The first step in the cycle is the pre-deployment phase. This consists of lots of stress, for both the soldier and the family members involved. For the gap between finding out they are being to be deployed to actually leaving some soldiers might have a very short and limited time frame between notification and deployment or a very long time, both time spans can have a huge effect depending on factors such as if the parent is single or divorced and how many children or if the family is expecting their first child. The second phase is the looking ahead. _____________________. Next in order is the hardest of them all, the time to say goodbye. The saying, this isn’t goodbye, I’ll see you later isn’t necessarily also true for military personnel and their families. When saying goodbye to children some service members often avoid it all together and leave while the child is asleep or at school. This however could lead to issues of abandonment because the child or children will still fret that their father is going to disappear while their away, even if it’s not being deployed. But for those who choose to say goodbye, it’s a slipper stone. Depending on the age of the child they might not be able to retain information for long periods of time and won’t remember that their father is leaving. While children that are older sometimes rebel or feel betrayed and act out due to the news. (Parenting cycle development)
The father has been deployed and said his goodbyes now it’s time for the real separation issues to begin. The fourth stage is deployment is what’s called the separation phase. _____________________. Now that the deployment has happened, it means a new way of life for the family back at home, especially when it comes to parenting. There’s parenting from the home front as well as parenting from the war zone, each holding different types of challenges for both parents, but the focus here is the fathers at war and yet still manage to...

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