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Grieving For Children And Adults Essay

2315 words - 10 pages

“Grief can't be shared. Everyone carries it alone. His own burden in his own way” (Lindbergh). Grieving the loss of a loved one can be the most emotionally draining time of any human being’s life. Not only is this a time for saying good bye to the ones we hold dear in our hearts, but it is also a time for change, change that is not seen as pleasant or embraced. This change is continuing on in life without the ones we have lost. For the majority, this experience is difficult but most have the support and love of family to make it through, but for others, this can be a lonesome and maybe even an impossible task. This experience will affect a person both emotionally and physically, but it ...view middle of the document...

Through this process, people may experience odd thoughts or behaviors. Anthony W. Love, Deputy Head of the School of Psychological Science says “Changes to thinking may include obsessive preoccupation with former attachments, poor concentration, fantasizing, apathy, disorientation and confusion, ruminating about the circumstances of the death, experiencing a sense of the presence of the deceased and trying to make sense of the loss” (Love, 75). Physical changes may include headaches, nausea, fatigue, tension inability to sleep, eat, and ignoring personal hygiene or a healthy diet are common. Loss of motivation in a person to just function and provide for their daily needs is normal but should not go on for an extended period of time.
Grieving for children is slightly different from adults grieving. “Remember, any child old enough to love is old enough to mourn…with our love and attention, they will learn to understand their loss and grow to be emotionally healthy children, adolescents, and adults” (Dr. Wolfelt, qtd. In Michaelson 48). During this time, it is important for adults to help children understand and handle the situation in a more mature manner. Kids, especially younger ones might have confusion or not understand what death is or why it occurred. Parents should let their children ask as many questions as they need to about what has happened. This will help create an open and supportive environment for a child in this frightening situation. Giving them answers to their questions will also help further their understanding of the passing. An adult should monitor their own actions and tone of voice when children are present. Staying calm and talking in a gentle voice will prevent panic and help children feel more secure. Taking a child’s thoughts and feelings into consideration and hearing what they have to say will make them feel more involved and closer to the deceased. This also involves letting them decide things for themselves such as attending the funeral service, viewing the deceased’s body, and going to the gravesite where the body will be buried (Michaelson, 48). If a child does or does not want to participate, that is their decision and it should be accepted. But if a child does wish to participate, it is helpful to them in getting closure. During grieving children will feel the same pain, confusion, and fear just as any adult will.
Family and those that are close to the deceased are not the only ones who feel anguish. They aid in grief counseling and handling the departed. Funeral directors may help a family deal with a loss through grief counseling themselves or refer families to a grief therapist. Either way, a huge part of a funeral director’s job is to show compassion and empathy towards families during this difficult time. It is a fine line when dealing with emotions while being a mortician or a funeral director. They have to show sympathy and support to the family, but they cannot let their emotions...

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