A major components of a relationship requires positive communication between couples who are involved in the bond. If communication lacks in the relationship, it could make the connection weak and could cause it to crumble. It seems that today, most married couples have replaced face to face conversations with the convenience of electronics. This has made hearing words a cloudy issue, especially with the introduction of technology. Instead of sitting down and having a conversation, couples are now relying on texting, emails or Skype to communicate.
Growing up in the 1960’s, communication was very much different than it is today. People had the choice of talking on the phone or use a method of speech that would include a personal touch and be ready to respond with feedback. Then along came Electronically Mediated Communication (EMC) “communication that is not face to face, but rather is sent via a medium”. (Beebe, Beebe and Redmond 15) This would change the way people communicate to each other, have an effect on their relationships, and remove the personal side of a conversation.
I have chosen to write about my own marriage and how our relationship is based on having a strong communication between the two of us. In order to build a strong relationship, the foundation needs to be started from the basement up. The first step requires a couple to be open and honest with each other, and not bending the sending information so that you are only giving just enough information to satisfy your part of the conversation.
Prior to my marriage with Debbie, I would take any of my personal information and make it part of a one way street of communication, especially with any relationships that I was previously involved in. I would build a communication strainer, due to a fear of hearing any negative feedback from any of my listeners that could lower my self-esteem.
In some cases, I would limit communication or even eliminate any of the information that was shared from others. I was starting to develop a protective shell around me, shutting down the line of communication and become guilty of Selective Recall. “Remembering things that I wanted to remember and forgetting the things that I would have rather forget”. (Beebe, Beebe and Redmond 65) This was one of the things that I was starting to excel at, and it was keeping others out of my conversations. My communication structure was starting to crack and I needed to change things.
It would take a special person to help me challenge this hurdle of interpersonal communication. Then along came someone who would change my outlook on communication and help me return to not just being a listener, but return to a talented speaker again. Prior to meeting Debbie, I would just smile and listen to other people communicate. When it came time for me to give any input to the subject of communication, I would clam up, due to the fear of not being on the same level of education as others. My self-esteem was on the low end...