I Must Write Essay

775 words - 4 pages

I feel like giving up. Stop trying too hard because the result will always be the same despite of the effort I put in. I have tried to wheedle myself believing that I can do better, but so far there is no change in the outcome. Time is running out and hopes of making a change are dying and I am tempted to simply throw in the towel, and succumb to the defeat. It feels like am trying to catch the wind. Why is this so hard difficult for me? All I want is to make a step in English. To prove that I too can write a good paper. To relish writing the English papers, but it has proven to be extremely difficult. I wonder why it is the only subject that am not doing well or advancing. It is hard to concede that I cannot make any amelioration and that it is too late to reverse work that is already done. The thought of writing English papers is very daunting and prompts me ruminate that I might never be a good writer. I hear these two voices inside of me: one says that I can still put in some extra effort that might change my grade, but I have limited time remaining and there is only a few more papers to write. The latter voice says that I should give up and stop stressing myself over papers, because I cannot do any better than I have already done.
I’m to make a choice between which voice to obey. Since there is still some little hope left in me, I choose put in some more work and finish with some improvements. I think that my failure is due to not participating in class discussions, not making helpful friends in school to assist with my English papers, maybe my concentration is never in class, or I might be thinking that English is so easy that I end up not putting enough practice in writing more papers to improve my paper writing capability. Perhaps I am making all of these mistakes. I remember an incident when I attended the class session and after it was over, I had no idea of what the lecture had been about. It is only now, after I realize that am the worst performed...

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