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The Mother Daughter Relationship In The Kitchen God's Wife

3587 words - 14 pages

The Mother Daughter Relationship in The Kitchen God's Wife

    Relationships mold people's thoughts and the way they live their lives. One very important relationship is the relationship between parents and their children. Parents are the first teachers of children. The most significant lesson one learns from them is love. When a baby is first born it instantly will feel love from the mother. A mother loves and nurtures her baby while it is still in her womb making the relationship between a mother and her child stronger than any other relationship. Only a woman can nurture her baby by using only her body. The bond between the mother and daughter is even more intense because they share the same femininity. A mother and daughter can bond like no other. Girls grow up looking up to their mother and wanting to resemble them when they grow up. Daughters seek their mother's to give them advice when they need help throughout their lives. When a girl is struck with a problem the first person she will turn to would be her mother. However some women are unable to have strong relationships with their mothers, this can be seen in then novel The Kitchen God's Wife by Amy Tan. Unfortunately Jiang Weili wasn't able to have a powerful relationship with her mother. Because of her mothers absence Jiang Weili wasn't able to find her own identity and isn't able to have a productive relationship with her daughter. Pearl feels alienated from her mother however, Jiang Weili only believes she is doing the best for her daughter. Pearl and Winnie prove that the mother daughter relationship is essential for a girl to become a woman. The lack of such a relationship is severely detrimental to a girl growing up.


Jiang Weili, Winnie never gets to know her mother subsequently she accepts the Chinese ideal of a woman. Winnie's mother's name is never mentioned in the book demonstrating that she never knew her mother.


"In my heart there is a little room. And in that room there is a little girl, still six years old. She is always waiting, an achy hoping, and hoping beyond reason."(403).  Winnie was unable to remember her mother's name because it wasn't mentioned in her childhood. When Winnie does remember her mother she remembers exceptionally odd happenings. Winnie can only remember just minor visions of her mother. She can remember her mother combing her hair. A young girl learns beauty techniques from her mother, combing their being one of them. Winnie watches her mother comb her hair; her mother doesn't pay attention to her little girl watching. She continues combing her hair not offering to show Winnie or to teach her, symbolizing the disconnected relationship they share. Another vision Winnie has of her mother is just of her admiring herself in the mirror, examining her face. Winnie merely standing behind her mother while she examines herself in the mirror, she never turned around to acknowledge that her...

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