I got up feeling a bit melancholy at the age of 11. I remember seeing my dad's truck pull down our driveway at a very early hour in the day. Oh wait, it was a Thursday, and if my mom noticed his predictable habit of coming home on Thursday mornings, nothing may have happened. It's so weird how that it was that long ago my mom finally decided to leave him, and yet he acts the exact same way he did then, if not worse than he does now.
I ran to the bathroom because I knew exactly what was going to happen. First my dad would ask why my mom's "friends" were going through all our stuff and bagging it. They would say they're helping her clean. He would nod and continue like a normal Thursday; make breakfast for himself then watch a little TV. But today was not a normal Thursday. Maybe a minute or less later I watched outside the bathroom window as a moving van came down the driveway. Our family, as we knew it, was demolished.
My mom hadn't even told my dad where she was going, let alone that she was even going. She told him she was going to leave him a note, then give him a call later tonight after we had left. My dad yelled, screamed, shouted, and made her feel guilty as much as he could, but her mind was made up. I went to my room basically drowned in tears when he came down, and sat next to me. He looked me right in the eye, with a stern look on his face. With a booming voice, he said, "If you leave, I will never see you again. You will see me as much as you see your real dad." I started crying harder, trying to show him how much it was hurting, but for some reason he continued. I now realize he just wanted to unload his pain onto someone else, someone he felt superior to.
I later called my two friends, Jessica and Nicole, to tell them the news. My mom had made me hold in the secret that she was leaving my dad. I couldn't and didn't tell anyone. Not even writing it down. I guess I really didn't believe it since she had mentioned it so many times before. So I told Jessica, she came over also in tears as we talked things over. We ordered Chinese food while everyone was packing for me, my dad even joined in. After that, I called Nicole to tell her, she set down the phone and I could hear crying in the background. "Uhm, maybe this is a bad time?"
After all was settled and my dad looked at us then slowly walked into the house, we were off to Sacramento. That day was the turning point for the next 8 months of my life. I never realized how much a divorce and/or separation could change a family so drastically. When my mom and her first husband divorced, I was only 3, and only remember flashes of them yelling and my dad's countless times of taking me into his car for a drive as my mom shouted at him to stay away from me.
One outcome of that day was my mom's need to always be gone. She didn't like being reminded of what she had to come home too; me, bills, pleading calls from my...