My name is Kristi; I am 33 years old and residing in Holiday, Fl. I was born and raised in Odessa, Fl. to a single mother and 3 older brothers. I do not recall much of my childhood except that of chaos and distress. I know growing up I always felt very alone and sad. By the age of 13 I seemed to turn the other cheek from abuse, neglect, and abandonment to an angry, abusive, now self medicating teenager.
I left home when I was 13 (running away for 2 years and coming back running away and coming back) during these times I had used anything I could to change the way I felt. By the age of 16 I was in and out of Juvenile detention for running away and truancy and placed in a foster home. Although I was still very angry I commenced to do things that were suggested (school, work, etc.).
When I was 18 I reached adult hood and had no real clue how to live or be responsible. I turned to the streets and did what most young girls on the street do, after being introduced to crack cocaine. I had my first child in my addiction and continued to live the life of self destruction (with no intentions of doing so), but simply had a monkey on my back that convinced me I was no better. By this time I was in and out of jails and institutions for different drug related offenses and still unable, unwilling, and too hopeless to break the cycle. So life as a con and drug addict continued for me until I was 25 yrs old. I did manage to get a certification for cosmetology and was now able to do hair for a living, outside of my other tricks and trades to get more drug money.
At this phase of my life I was desperately trying to reunifying with my mother and starting to feel the desperation for a true life. I was till feeling alone and empty and wanted a connection to someone and some things other than drugs and alcohol. After several failed attempts and interventions from the state of Fl. and my mother, I went to a treatment center for 6 months and got sober. I had finally arrived at a place where I didn't feel like an outsider, these people knew my problem and wanted to help me. In my still low self esteem and all these lonely moments with no more drugs and alcohol to keep me numb I had a sexual relationship with someone and got pregnant. I just knew now that God had truly blessed me and this was my new life as it was meant...