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Nigerian Aviation Minister Orders Kata Kata Magazine As A Therapy

982 words - 4 pages

Often, when kata kata (trouble, pandemonium, problems, chaos….) starts coming your way, you mostly take all necessary steps within your power to have it solved – or suppressed, as the case may be. With this in mind, it has become apparently clear to us why our office received an unexpected phone call yesterday from the embattled Nigerian minister of Aviation Ms. Ella St Ahodu requesting us to send her some “therapy” to cope with her present challenges in life. Asked what kind of therapy she had in mind, she replied desperately ”your Kata Kata Cartoon Magazine, of course.”
The request is not unexpected. Definitely, not when the honorable minister is experiencing one problem after another. ...view middle of the document...

The disappearance only added more mystery to the subject. If anything, the doctoring of the minister’s profile ended up creating more suspicion and doubts about the minister’s standpoint. Is the minister hiding something or is her action a tactical admission?
“ Hiding what? Since when have you become our website administrator? We update our website regularly, so I don’t understand the fuss” Replied one Mr Ajayi, who spoke to our reporter on the phone.
Asked why the link to Ms. Oduah's profile had been deactivated and all references to St. Paul's College removed from the site, he stammered:
“You see.... You know we often have deadly viruses on the computer. I assume you are a computer literate yourself, so you know what I mean.”
“Could it be that this virus, after supposedly attacking the website of the aviation ministry, marched gallantly to the personal website of the minister, fearlessly attacked it and mercilessly removed any reference to St. Paul's College?” Our reporter asked.
“Ahaaa! You see why I said you are a computer literate. You now understand what the honorable minister meant when she insisted she had many seen and unseen enemies, as such, she needed bullet – proof cars? I mean a car. First, they tried to eliminate her through assassins, she successfully thwarted their efforts by ordering those bullet-proof cars.. am.. Yes… car; now they came after her through internet remote. We have since sent an urgent request to the President and members of the House of Representatives requesting their immediate approval of another N355million for armored computers.” Mr Ajayi responded.
“Armored computers?”
“Haven’t you heard of that?
“N355million, just for computers?” Kata Kata reporter asked surprised
“That one is even a small amount. You see, assassins you can bribe, but how do you bribe a stubborn virus? That invisible killer is even more dangerous that visible criminals! Ajayi defended.
The purchase of the cars generated outrage because its cost was believed to have been inflated,...

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