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Personal Essay: Being Bullied

795 words - 4 pages

I had never really paid attention to the way I looked. It did not really bother me, to be honest, and I had never had problems with bullies either. That was until I got into grade 10. I was not fat and I was not that skinny either, I was classifies as average. Healthy. But, you see, the new look of society was super skinny. If you were not that size, you were not sociably acceptable. This did not bother me at first because I liked the way I was and I also had a couple of friends who also felt the same way. We did not really care if we were popular or not, we only cared about the way we felt about ourselves and how comfortable we were in our own skin. Well that’s what I thought. A couple of days went by and my friends started to crave the attention that the other skinny girls were getting. Those girls had an infinite quantity of friends and almost everybody wanted to be their friends. My friends quickly started to wear more make-up, go on extreme diets and putting their ...view middle of the document...

I was scared; I had nobody to talk too. I did not want to talk to my parents even if they were the most supportive and selfless people who helped me through everything. I was even afraid to talk to my brother and sister who were always there for me. I decided to keep the problem to myself. I was the type of person who was suffering in silence. I hated talking to people about my problems. It made me feel weak and that I was an attention grabber. Slowly did I know that keeping the bullying to myself was a bad Idea. As the days went by everything was pilling up. I was isolating myself from others, I did not want to go to school, I was skipping meal’s, I was feeling sick, my notes were getting lower and I even had some suicidal feelings at some point. I was trapped in my own mind. My own thoughts had even started to go against me. I started bullying myself in my head. I used to wake up every morning, look in the mirror and think, “Who would have ever wanted to be friends with you anyway? You are fat, you are worthless.” I used to let these thoughts control my life. It was at that point that I realized I had to change. I needed to become skinny, so I can prove a lesson to those girls. The mean thoughts that those girls used to say had probably helped me, they were my motivation. I then decided to take matters in my own hands and skipped meals and having unhealthy habits. A couple of weeks later that turned against me. I had fainted and was hospitalized. I became so weak I could barely move. I had stayed for about a month at the hospital and it’s at that point that I realized, why let them control you? Society was treating us like puppets. They were controlling the way we thought, the way we acted and how we saw others. Apparently it is bad to be different, we all have to be super skinny and literally become a copy of something we are not. Our society is supposed to be good, but little do we know that it’s the worst thing. We are the spectators to its show. Why not be yourself and be happy? Well, that is how I see life now. I do not care if I am bulky, I love myself the way I am and nothing can change that. If people do not like me because I do not reach up to their standards well good for them. My past is gone and I will not let it bother me anymore. I am now the happiest I have ever been, and it will stay like that forever.

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