This website uses cookies to ensure you have the best experience. Learn more

Relationships And Communication: Hard To Get Vs. Easy To Get

3943 words - 16 pages

Relationships and Communication
It is inevitable that we meet a person who agrees with everything someone says, just to be accepted. Though it makes us feel good to have our thoughts validated by someone agreeing with our attitudes, at what point does a person’s unselective agreement begin to do more harm than good?
One major influence to this study is what Walster, Walster, Piliavin and Schmidt termed the elusive phenomenon. The elusive phenomenon refers to the commonly held concept that the more elusive a person of romantic interest is, the more other people will desire that person. What Walster et al. thought would be a simple research investigation turned out to be much more complicated than expected. These researchers believed, as popular culture would have us believe, that because a woman is hard-to-get, this alone makes her more valued, or a more desired prize. In other words, a popular woman has reason, and ability to be more selective in choosing their dating partners. On the other hand, if a woman is easy-to-get this is automatically a signal that the woman is likely desperate for a date, any date and that she is likely to put significant pressure on a dating partner and the relationship to get serious quickly.
Walster et al. continued on this line of thinking for five research studies, and with each one they failed to support their hypothesis, that is they failed to show that a woman who is hard-to-get is valuable simply on the basis that she is hard-to-get. What they soon discovered is that following the logic of popular culture was getting them nowhere. After returning to the drawing board Walster et al. finally hit the jackpot. They considered that there instead were two parts to consider, ‘(a) How hard or easy is she for him to get; (b) how hard or easy she is for other men to get’. (Walster, et al., 1971) This eventually led to the realization that out of four possible combinations (a. easy for him to get, hard for other men to get, b. hard for him to get, hard for other men to get, c. easy for him to get, easy for other men to get, d. hard for him to get, easy for other men to get) that only one combination would come out as being especially elusive and therefore valuable. This especially elusive and valuable combination was found to be when a woman was known for being hard to get, but for one man she was easy to get. Only in this combination would her value and her desirability become greater than all other combinations.
In a similar line of research Wright & Contrada (1986) sought to strengthen the findings of Walster et al. Thus, Wright and Contrada performed three experiments, in the first experiment they found that various degrees of selectivity were a contributing factor to creating a favorable impression of an individual. In the second experiment, Wright & Contrada extend the idea of dating selectivity to examine both men and women. They found that women were harsher raters of selectivity than men were. However the...

Find Another Essay On Relationships and Communication: Hard to Get vs. Easy to Get

Women in a Man’s World: Why it’s Hard for Women to Get Ahead in Sportscasting

1600 words - 6 pages the people that apply. These odds are discouraging but to hear them every time you admit to wanting to be a sportscaster, it feels even worse. Although ESPN hiring rate for women seems to be the highest in the sports business, it’s very hard to get there if you have no encouragement from peers. Authors Marie Hardin and Stacie Shain explain this phenomenon once women get hired, how discouraging it can be in the work place when your peer’s don’t

Prisoners Get The Easy Way Out

2800 words - 12 pages parole or probation, or was incarcerated in a prison or jail (Glaze and Herberman). With this many inmates, it is very difficult to actually keep up with every inmate in the system. According to the late Warren E. Burger and 15th Chief Justice, many of these inmates needed to be forced to at least attempt to change. Once the ball got rolling, it was a lot easier to get inmates to cooperate and make the effort to learn from their mistakes (Burger

How to get ripped

769 words - 4 pages When you begin this exercise you may believe this exercise is rather difficult not because this motion is hard in fact its easy you just have bad balance. Balance is garnered through long stretching and deep breathing. The first stretch you want to begin with is the "Lunge quad stretch". when you are doing this exercise really dig deep and use those leg muscles. 2.Push ups

How to get proper rest

9837 words - 39 pages the people they find, exchange e-mails and phone calls, and meet in the real world. Although a database might produce a list of possibilities and screen out obviously undesirable people, it can't predict chemistry. More often than not, people who seem perfect online just don't click in person. Electronic services do help single people expand their pool of potential dates, but they're no substitute for the hard work of romance. Answers to Exercise

Trying to Get Over Us

1033 words - 5 pages grabbed her hand and pulled her back. He stared at her for a while before shaking his head. She didn't know how, but she had to get over him. There was no way that she could run back to him in five years when he was acting like that. Unfortunately, that wasn't going to be easy, especially now that she was carrying his child.

Trying to Get over Us

1558 words - 7 pages Veronica was getting ready to leave the hospital the morning after. While collecting everything, she came to the realization that she had no way of getting home. It was Zoey that brought her there in her car, and she was gone. As a matter of fact, she didn’t even know which hospital she was in, or even where in Ohio she was. She had no idea how she was going to get back to her apartment, but she apparently would have to stay at the hospital

Trying to Get over Us

1593 words - 7 pages back at first. He must have really upset her this time. “I’m not lying. I really do love you. In fact, I even got rid of the drugs.” “Look, Jon, even if you really love me, we both need to move on. I’m trying to, and I think you should do the same. Things will never work out between us, no matter how hard we try.” “It’s Zoey’s fault that Andrew came back.” He hung up before she could get a word in, just so she would be forced to call him back for

Trying to Get over Us

977 words - 4 pages threw it aside. Without even giving him time to stare at her, Veronica pulled him back down, allowing him to feel her hard nipples against his bare chest. “Jesus, Val…” She writhed beneath him, trying to unbutton her skirt. He was tempted to tear it off, but he instead let her do it herself while he moved his hands to his pants, unbuttoning them and discarding it along with his underwear. He noticed that she was still struggling with her skirt

Trying to Get over Us - 1148 words

1148 words - 5 pages A/N: Hey guys! I'm coming back home in a few hours, and I decided to update now. I'll have a long day tomorrow, and if I decide to do it after I get back, you'll see the update at almost midnight. Now, thank you ia178, OtherLuces, tinalovesambrose, YourxNightmarexHasxArrived, LovingDeanAmbrose, and xXKennedyLovesSnakeXx. Anyway, here's the next chapter. Enjoy, and don't forget to leave a review! Chapter Eight Jon had just finished wrestling

How To Get Good Tips

676 words - 3 pages How To Get Good Tips Having been a waitress for two years I've learned many tricks to getting good tips.First, you've got to be friendly. No one wants to go out to eat to have a good time and get stuck with a server who doesn't smile. Smiling is the most important because it makes a great first impression. However, don't be too friendly or your customers will feel attacked and smothered, and that's the last thing you want.Compliments are another

Trying to Get over Us - 1398 words

1398 words - 6 pages disbelief and lust. She enjoyed the idea that she caught him off guard, since he usually was the one to do it. She continued to kiss him hard, her hands delving into his boxer. His body immediately went moderately limp in response, relaxing into her touch as their kiss slowed. Her hand drew up and down him, causing Jon to moan quietly into her mouth. She felt his hand slip under her shirt and drift up and down her back in time with her strokes

Similar Essays

Playing Hard To Get Essay

2759 words - 11 pages experiments, all of which failed! They had the same hypothesis as I proposed, that a woman who is hard to get to go out on a date would be more valued by a man, rather than a woman who is easy to get. This was not true due to the fact that men simply get frustrated with these types of women, and do not want to waste their time on a woman who does not show the same interest that they have in them. What they found instead was that

How To Get Rid Of Cellulite Naturally: Five Easy Tips

722 words - 3 pages How to Get Rid of Cellulite Naturally – The 5 Easy Tips Posted by Jaymee on October 6th, 2011 Has the concern – how to get rid of cellulite naturally – ever crossed your mind? If you are a woman and you’re way past 20, the answer would probably be a resounding yes. Cellulite is a confidence killer as it can destroy your appearance as well as scar your emotion. Over 90% of females suffer from cellulite to a certain degree. This generally

How To Get An "Easy" A On Your Homework And Make Y

800 words - 3 pages Process Paper How to Get an ?Easy? A on Your Homework and Make Your Teacher Feel Great Have you ever wanted to get an A on a homework assignment and did not want to really try? Here is a way you could get an A without working hard! But first, you have to know how to get people to believe you are working hard.Now the first thing you need to know about looking like you are working hard while you are working in front of your teacher or in front of

How To Get Rid Of Cellulite In A Safe And Easy Way

1089 words - 5 pages How to Get Rid of Cellulite On A Safe And Easy Way Posted by Jaymee on October 6th, 2011 Want to know How to Get Rid of Cellulite? Body image issues are one of the debilitating factors that affect anyone’s self-esteem and confidence. Any alterations in the physicality and exterior of the body always go hand in hand with the interior aspects of well being which disables an individual’s self concept. Cellulite: Cellulites are one of the body