Retrospection On Writing Essay

1135 words - 5 pages

Yuwei Chen
Retrospection on Writing
When I saw the news saying that after 15 years Leonardo DiCaprio was embarrassed about his performance in Titanic, I did not expect that I would feel the same way when I read the college application essay I wrote one year ago. Although I submitted the final draft because at that time I believed it was the best revision, now I can immediately point out a couple of mistakes and weaknesses. The essay did not have adequate details about what I did in a program about finance and money management, and therefore it was confusing. Moreover, it had many weaknesses such as rough transitions and grammatical mistakes. If I were the admissions officer, I would not ...view middle of the document...

We were required to design and distribute questionnaires for a money management plan.” In this way, I do not have to think twice before finishing a complex sentence, and readers can comprehend my essay easily.
Moreover, the transitions between paragraphs and sentences were awkward. I did not write any transition sentences to connect paragraphs, so sentences and paragraphs were linked roughly. Thus, after one year, from the perspective of a reader, I think that the essay is chopped into several unrelated pieces and they cannot convey a clear thesis altogether. For instance, I mentioned my unpleasant presentation experience in a paragraph and ended it with the sentence “I couldn't answer a question from my peers about a concept in my slides, which was embarrassing.” Nevertheless, in the next paragraph, I suddenly started narrating that “several managers gave us lectures in the next few days, but the final project… was the most impressive lesson.” What separated these two paragraphs was not only the “enter” button, but also the logical and chronological gap. Since my essay was in chronological order, the lack of transition phrases or sentences led to a failure to establish connections between ideas. At that time, I did not recognize the importance of transitions and believed that as long as I expressed my ideas clearly, my readers could understand my thesis. After taking college writing classes, I realized that smooth transitions will link the essay as a whole and promote readers’ understanding of the essay as a whole. To resolve this problem, I will use more transition words such as “moreover”, “however”, and “although” to clarify the relations between sentences and paragraphs. Also, by mentioning the key words in the prior paragraph, I will be able to switch topics more smoothly.
Nonetheless, the biggest problem of this essay was not the rough transitions, but the lack of details about the program and my performance. I found that I tended to omit some details. I either wrote something generally, or completely ignored and skipped it. In my application essay, I wrote that I was unable to step out of my comfort zone to distribute survey. However, as to...

Find Another Essay On Retrospection on Writing

Plato's life and contributions to society.. What is known about his past, and how he enhanced the world around him

1629 words - 7 pages Plato is a man that has, in a way, been immortalized. Even though, he lived and died thousands of years ago, his thoughts and his ideas still live on today. In order to most accurately get a feel for who Plato was, there are many factors to be looked at. First, one should look at the times in which Plato lived. This includes, but is not limited to, the culture, the common thought, and any major historical happenings. Second, one should examine

Baldwin's Writing Style in Notes to a Native Son

1514 words - 6 pages life and death, along with other examples, that he executes throughout the essay. In retrospection, he perceives his father’s death as a time of sadness and regrets not having a healthier rapport with him and he mentions that his siblings are happy that their father will never come home again. He tells us about the race riots in Detroit and New Jersey and criticizes afterwards. These happenings show the influence they have on Baldwin as he writes

In Search of Our Mothers' Gardens: Sainthood

1489 words - 6 pages her essay "In Search of Our Mothers' Gardens," Walker ponders the histories and legacies of black American women who found, somehow, even in the bondage of slavery, an inextinguishable need and ability to create. Walker refers to these women not as slaves, or Africans, or Americans, or even women-she calls them saints: "these crazy saints stared out on the world, wildly, like lunatics..." (Walker 695). I'd read the essay twice before I began to

We Leave Home But Eventually Return Home

2055 words - 9 pages This essay is an examination of two short stories to consider where they have in common in terms of cultural issues of identity and ensuing difficulties and problems. There are also gender identity difficulties in both short stories but for the most part this essay will concentrate on the issues of culture identity. At first glance the two short stories seem to have little in common but on closer examination there is actually much in common. The

Music and Pop Culture: Elvis

2212 words - 9 pages Elvis Presley may be the single most significant figure in American 20th century popular music. Not necessarily the best, and certainly not the most unswerving. But no one could dispute with the fact that he was the musician accountable for popularizing rock & roll on an international level. Viewed in cold sales figures, his influence was unparalleled. A continuum of international smashes from the mid-'50s through to the '70s, as well as the

Social criticism in The Great Gatsby and Great Expectations

2254 words - 9 pages novel is narrated through the moral retrospection of Nick Carrawy, a man who himself is critical of the greed, carelessness and the delusional nature of the stories primary characters. Even though he is a bond salesman, a person whose job is to do nothing else than to contrive and employ the most efficient methods of making money, reiterating Fitzgeralds theme of illusion verses reality. The negative effects of greed on society are shown through

Applying Author Intent and Influence to James O’Barr’s The Crow

4077 words - 16 pages authors as Poppy Z. Brite, David Bischoff, A.A. Attanasio (another person O’Barr credits with influencing his writing - CrowFanClub.com), and Nancy A. Collins. But what possibly makes O’Barr’s original story even more remarkable is that while he shares some of his culture and is creating this entirely new “culture” or genre, O’Barr also examines the concepts of pain, death, and personal loss, reporting not only on the events itself, but also on the

Media And Crime

3309 words - 13 pages When it comes to reporting crime the media is confronted daily with decisions on how to present their stories, what to write and what not to write, of choosing to report the bad news, misquoting those they interview, and sensationalizing. People come to believe what they read and, in a sense, is irrelevant whether what they believe is true or not, for their ideas affect how they live their lives. They develop an exaggerated and distorted fear of

Wild Duck - Naturalistic & Symbolic

3077 words - 12 pages need for dressing up; it can walk naked. ` What I find interesting about The Wild Duck is that if Zola's theory upon Naturalism is true then Ibsen has conditioned his whole play to play upon the dangers that exposing the truth can bring. Ibsen uses Gregers to expose the truth, if the truth can really `walk naked', why is it so ugly on exposure. Advances upon the technical aspect of theatre that were in operation in Ibsen's time of writing

Michèle Roberts’s The Looking Glass

6346 words - 25 pages linearity, this novel presents a complex timescale, which is repetitious and cyclical. History is not presented as a movement from A to B, but a series of re-traversals, covering the same ground on different feet and indulging in a process of retrospection which, by its nature, can never be authoritative or true. At the conclusion of the text, Geneviève determines to return home to the place of her first love, her love for her substitute mother, and the

When did the Germans lose the 1939 -45 War

7561 words - 30 pages . Churchill, more than any other man, had led the Allied powers in their mortal fight against Nazism, and thus, more than any other man, deserves credit for the victory.To the mammoth task of defeating Nazi Germany, Churchill brought to bear many of his special qualities: courage, perseverance, independence, physical and emotional resilience, superb writing and speaking skills, and a keen sense of history. Below we examine each and speculate on

Similar Essays

Personal Challenges And Transformation As A Writer

1033 words - 4 pages Anais Nin, a Cuban author, once said, “We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospection”. Writing is like photography. It has a thousand different meanings and will always be there for times of reminiscing. It has been an important part of my life by enabling me to convey my inner thoughts that cannot easily be spoken. It serves as proof of my greatest memories, but also moments of despair. However, there were several

Identity In The Works Of Eavan Boland And Seamus Heaney

2139 words - 9 pages poems which express an internal struggle with roles of identity and how they recreate their roles to fit their needs. Through retrospection and reflection, both poets come to realize that the roles they led as well as those they reinvented have created their own personal identities. Boland, in her essay Lava Cameo, touches on several emotions (loss, despair, etc) and episodes in her life which capture the essence of her identity. It is this notion

Narration And Perspective In Pramoedya's Inem

1537 words - 6 pages is little conscious evaluation of this society delivered in the narration. This is ultimately left to the sub-text, of what is left unsaid. It is quite clear where the author stands on the issues the short story raises, and through the naïveté in the children's perspective presented in the narrator's recollections, an intense and vivid resemblance to reality in this very retrospection, and the narrative sequencing that remorselessly directs the

The Other Bronte Sister: Charlotte Essay

1461 words - 6 pages from her. The deep sorrow is so freely expressed through each word and phrase.(www.poemhunter.com/poem/on-the-death-of-anne-bront) Charlotte Bronte also wrote a poem called Retrospection. This was one of the many poems she wrote after she returned from Roe Head. This poem was also said to be one of the most famous poems Charlotte had written during this time. The poem reflected on Charlotte’s longing to go home. It was also a reflection of the