The Adversities Of Evading An Abusive Relationship

2162 words - 9 pages

The Adversities of Evading an Abusive Relationship
A relationship provides refuge, love and trust between two partners but every relationship has flaws that can permanently taint the two individuals and their bond. A major conflict that occurs in many relationships is domestic abuse. It is the control that a partner in an intimate relationship, who is usually the male in a heterosexual relationship, tries to exert on the female with methods such as physical, verbal and sexual abuse (Domestic Violence and Abuse). However, there are many cases in which women should stay in an abusive relationship rather than evade it because of contributing factors that revolve around societal views. In the novels, A Thousand Splendid Suns written by Khaled Hosseini and Black and Blue written by Anna Quindlen, there are characters that experience domestic abuse in their marriages which forces them to act on the difficult decision of leaving the abusive relationship only to face hardships such as survival and coping children. Even though their toxic relationships have ended, there is still unrest in these women’s lives thus causing ultimate destruction that they themselves have created by terminating the relationship. It is clear that women should endure the abusive bond because the complications that they must face post leaving are worse than the situation they were in when they were involved in the vehement relationship.
To begin, many women who leave an abusive relationship are more vulnerable to extreme levels of danger than they were when they were with their violent partner, thus minimizing their chances of survival and jeopardizing their safety. In A Thousand Splendid Suns, Mariam and Laila, who are both married to Rasheed, try and elope with their children to escape his cruel lifestyle, yet they are caught. Pursuing this further, when Rasheed becomes knowledgeable of his wives plotting to leave him, he becomes ludicrous: “But in Rasheed’s eyes, she saw murder for them both. And so Mariam raised the shovel high… and with that, she brought down the shovel. This time, she gave it everything she had” (Hosseini, 349). It is evident that Rasheed’s fury reflects his intent on killing the women since they injured his pride and deteriorated his control by choosing to leave him. However, under self defense, Mariam ultimately kills him and although their relationship has now ended, the result is only destruction for Mariam. She must now face the Afghanistani law of capital punishment which she cannot survive. Today, many victimized women kill their abusers yet they are deemed as the criminal because of the laws that are in the region where they are inhabited in. A woman named Kelli was convicted for manslaughter for killing her abuser by shooting him since he was threatening her after she left him. She spent fifteen years in jail and after her sentence was finished, she became an advocate of domestic abuse victims. She believes that the judicial system neglects the...

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