When I look at the first paper that I did for this class, I can see that what I wrote was theme writing. As a matter of fact I think this is an example that could be used to show people what it is that they shouldn't do when trying to move away from theme writing. I have used all the elements that I was taught in high school, and I can't seem to get rid of them. When I look at this paper I see a loose intro as to what it is that I would like to accomplish, I see four to five paragraphs of information, and a conclusion. I think that when I wrote this, I did it automatically, and with out any further thought. All the other writing that I have had to do thus far has called for theme writing, and I have had a very hard time getting away from it. I think if I were to be given the same assignment again,I would write something that was completely different. I think the person I represent in this first paper, is a person who thought they were a good writer, and what the end product shows is that I'm not as good as I thought I was. By having another look at this paper, I can see that I have a long way to go before I can consider myself to be a good writer. The worst thing about this paper is that I did exactly what I wasn't supposed to do. I wrote a theme, and if I remember right, we weren't supposed to do that. I think that during this quarter I learned how to write papers that aren't as rigid as the ones that I have written in the past, but I still think I have a long way to go to get better. Besides, I don't think a writer is able to become a good writer in 12 weeks. I'm not even sure if I want to be a writer. I would rather analyze novels, and other writers works than my own.
I think the best way to describe the relationship between Carrie the writer, and Carrie the person would be to look at some of the writings that I have done thus far this quarter. I think that in my writing, I'm a person that isn't put together all that well. As a matter of fact, I have to sit back some times and wonder what the hell I was thinking of when I wrote a certain passage. I don't think my writing is very organized, and I don't think my writing is worth reading. In the past, I was able to write very well, but I really hadn't written anything since high school, and I think I lost the touch that I once had. One of the many problems that I have noticed in my writing is that I write way to fast. I don't think I let things fully develop in my mind before I commit them to paper. Sometimes I think my writing sounds like a deranged lunatic, and I often feel this way while writing. It's like I know what I want to say, but I just can't seem to find the right words to express who I feel.
Another way to describe my writing is that there seems to be an on going struggle between me the person, and me the writer. The feelings that I have here are the same as the above feelings, and I have to say it gets old after awhile. I would like to be able to sit down and...