Why Be A King When You Could Be A God?

3130 words - 13 pages

They say that you know you’ve done something amazing when the person receiving your good deed will never be able to repay you. When you owe someone your entire life, it means they did something extraordinary; it means they put their heart and soul into your heart and soul. I’m not talking about someone picking up your books for you when they come erupting from your hands as you’re walking down the hall; I’m talking about someone standing with you when the world is dark and full of despair – being your strength when you’re weak. And for me, I’m talking about Marshall Mathers (AKA Eminem, Slim Shady). All I can do is try to explain the significance he has to me, to thank him, to pay homage, but there’s no way that I could ever give him a gift like he gave me – and that’s worth talking about.
It was Christmas Eve of 2000: my nine year-old brother was given The Marshall Mathers LP from our uncle. I remember everyone looking around the room – almost completely silent due to the surprise of a child’s gift with the words “Parental Advisory Explicit Content” written all over the cover of it. I was only five so my favorite songs were from The Wizard of Oz and I was clueless as to why this CD was such a big deal, but in the next months I found myself consumed by the man rapping on the speakers in my brother’s room. Let’s flash forward, though. Now I’m ten: the world is no longer rainbows and kindergarten. My world turned dark that year, yet there I was standing tall; putting myself on the backburner so my mother didn’t completely lose her mind in the aftermath of my father’s infidelity and the destruction of their twenty year marriage. I get it. I’ve written about this so many times that I’ve gathered the fact that it wasn’t my responsibility to hide away in my room after everyone else had fallen asleep, crying until the tears literally dried out, but I did it because there was no way I could be a little girl anymore. I had to be a grown up. Anger, rage, disappointment, confusion… just some of the emotions rolling through the mind of a daughter in the midst of the most shocking divorce of the century. This is the year that same uncle who bought my brother MMLP bought me Curtain Call for Christmas. Looking back, I’m amused because this man buying these “dangerous” rap albums for his nephew and niece didn’t even listen to hip-hop. Regardless, I was so excited. My eyes lit up, my mouth watered, and I couldn’t wait to get home to rip it open and play it so I actually did it right there – in my saint-of-a-grandmother’s living room on Christmas Eve. By February I had every word to “Like Toy Solders” memorized, and by my birthday in June every single song on that “Greatest Hits” album by Eminem was so deeply engraved into my memory that I was trapped by a man that would come to save me from the worst times of my life and stand strong beside me through the best.
Before you question my sanity, I want to tell you that I understand Em’s music a...

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